Lessons from a Waiting Room: Weaving a New Life Chapter✨

The Stories We Carry

My week began with a full-day medical procedure. The procedure required multiple trips between the surgery and the waiting room, where it offered an unexpected tableau of life stories. I sat among a diverse group of people of all ages. Several were over 90; one a few days shy of 90, as he was quick to point out. While humble, they shared their stories. From a former Canadian Air Force pilot-turned-commercial aviator to a British naval officer seconded from the U.K. to the Canadian Yukon and serving as a specialized mechanic in Somalia, to an Acadian woman who traversed the globe as a missionary. Younger generations in the room (anyone under 70) found their elders too chatty to their liking. Their eyes rolled and they avoided engagement. However, if you sat and listened with respect, you would see our and their history etched in their posture, humble expression, and contributions to our lives. I couldn't help but feel like I had stepped into one of the historical fiction novels I love so much—books that chronicle the quiet resilience, hidden strengths, and unspoken challenges of women's lives through the centuries.

The Acadian woman, likely in her late 80s, was a living testament to a life richly lived; a storyteller shaped by her experiences as a missionary and an advocate for fostering meaningful connections. Though she had a tendency to recount the same tale to anyone willing to listen, her stories carried charm and wonder for those who engaged with her. She was deeply moved when I shared the title of one of my favourite novels of Canadian women's history, Promises to Keep, by Genevieve Graham - the story of the Acadian expulsion. It was a powerful reminder that every one of us carries a rich, complex history. These are not just stories of the past; they are the foundation upon which we build our next chapter. Our triumphs, our setbacks, and our wisdom are the very tools we need to design a future filled with purpose.

Fluid vs. Crystallized Intelligence: The Power of Our Experience

This theme of drawing on life experience carried over from our Encore Book Club conversation this week. In our discussion of Part Two of The New Long Life by Andrew J. Scott and Lynda Gratton, we explored thought-provoking concepts that redefine aging and thriving in a world shaped by increasing longevity and rapid technological advancements. One idea stood out to me as particularly impactful: the distinction between "fluid" and "crystallized" intelligence.

Fluid intelligence is our ability to reason quickly and think abstractly, often associated with but not exclusive to youth. It’s what helps us solve novel problems and learn new skills from scratch. This is why puzzles of any kind are an excellent pastime as we grow older.

Crystallized intelligence, on the other hand, is the accumulation of our knowledge, skills, and experiences over a lifetime. It’s the deep well of wisdom we draw from to make nuanced judgments, see the bigger picture, and navigate complex social situations.

Key Takeaways: 

• Our value doesn’t diminish; it evolves. By embracing our crystallized intelligence, we can lead, mentor, and innovate in ways that leverage decades of accumulated wisdom. This is the bedrock of our personal development and perhaps professional reinvention.

• AI is the latest frontier in technology, creating a level playing field where people of all ages can learn and contribute together. Younger generations can leverage their fluid intelligence to adapt quickly to this evolving landscape, while older generations can draw on their crystallized intelligence to provide valuable experience and insights.

My most empowering takeaway this week was reinforced by an endearing chance meeting with my elders in what otherwise was a stressful day. While fluid intelligence may change over time, our crystallized intelligence only grows richer and more potent. This depth of understanding and wealth of experience is our superpower in our later years. It simply cannot be replicated.

Living to Learn: Crafting Your Roadmap

Connecting the dots between our life stories and our accumulated wisdom brought me to the final piece of the puzzle: defining a clear vision for what's next. This isn't about aimless wandering, although a little wandering can be inspiring; it's also about intentional design. It's about shifting from a mindset of "living to work" to one of "living to learn," where every new endeavour is an opportunity for growth and contribution.

For women in our encore years, this means creating a roadmap that aligns with our values and leverages our strengths. It’s a transition plan that’s less about a single destination and more about a continuous journey of learning, impact, and fulfillment.

This is the core philosophy behind the themed programs I curate for the Executive Encore Network for Women, where we empower each other to build that roadmap.

Your vision might be starting a consulting business, leading a non-profit, or mentoring the next generation. Whatever it is, the process of creating it involves:

• Reflecting on your story: What are the key themes and strengths from your life's novel so far?
• Honouring your crystallized intelligence: What unique wisdom and experience can you offer the world?
• Defining your "why": What impact do you want to make in your next chapter?
• Building a plan: What are the actionable steps, resources, and support systems you need to turn your vision into reality?

From the book club to the medical waiting room and beyond, the message is clear: our lives are rich tapestries, and we are the weavers. We have the power, the wisdom, and the experience to design an encore chapter that is not just successful, but deeply meaningful.

What does your next chapter look like? Share your thoughts or one key takeaway from your own life's story in the comments below.